Welcome to Vera’s Blog!

New Year, Here I Come... As the end of the year approaches, it’s natural to start thinking about what’s next. But let’s be honest—how many times have you set big goals for the new year only to feel stuck, frustrated, or like you’re spinning your wheels a few months in?

If you’re anything like the countless people I’ve worked with, you’re probably tired of feeling like you’re on a hamster wheel—repeating the same patterns in your relationships, career, health, or even your self-worth.

It’s exhausting. It’s demoralizing. And sometimes, it feels impossible to change.

I’ve been there too…

I remember sitting at my kitchen table one cold December evening a few years ago, staring at a blank journal page. The same journal I’d optimistically bought the previous January, thinking, This is the year everything changes.

And yet, there I was again—same frustrations, same goals I hadn’t quite reached, and the same nagging feeling that maybe I was the problem. Maybe I just wasn’t trying hard enou...

What do I hear most often from clients who are struggling with their relationship?

“My partner and I fight all the time!”

In other words, many of the people I work with worry that they and their partner fight too much.

Where do these concerns come from? They’re usually rooted in unrealistic beliefs and expectations that people have about what a “healthy” relationship looks like.

Specifically, like some of my clients, you might think that if a relationship is healthy, you should hardly ever argue with your partner.

Why?

You’ve probably watched movies or read romance novels where the characters who are in love spend their days staring into each other’s eyes, cuddling in bed, and strolling down the street hand-in-hand, not arguing about how to manage their budget or who’s going to drive their kid to basketball practice at 6 a.m.

As a result, you might think that ANY kind of conflict in your relationship is a sign that something is wrong. And every time that conflict arises in your ...